A golf ball is like a clock. Always hit it at 6 o'clock and make it go toward 12 o'clock. But make sure you're in the same time zone. ~Chi Chi Rodriguez

I just hope I don't have to explain all the times I've used His name in vain when I get up there. ~Bob Hope, about his golfing

The golf swing is like a suitcase into which we are trying to pack one too many things. ~John Updike

I've spent most of my life golfing — the rest I've just wasted. ~Author Unknown

Columbus went around the world in 1492. That isn't a lot of strokes when you consider the course. ~Lee Trevino

I'd play every day if I could. It's cheaper than a shrink and there are no telephones on my golf cart. ~Brent Musburger

A passion, an obsession, a romance, a nice acquaintanceship with trees, sand, and water. ~Bob Ryan

If your opponent is playing several shots in vain attempts to extricate himself from a bunker, do not stand near him and audibly count his strokes. It would be justifiable homicide if he wound up his pitiable exhibition by applying his niblick to your head. ~Harry Vardon

If I can hit a curveball, why can't I hit a ball that is standing still on a course? ~Larry Nelson

In baseball you hit your home run over the right-field fence, the left-field fence, the center-field fence. Nobody cares. In golf everything has got to be right over second base. ~Ken Harrelson